Or maybe I'm hiding an important historical document in the satchel slung over the chair across from me that contains a map to a cache of hidden treasure kept in the little known catacombs underneath the State Capitol building just up the street from where I sit (though of course, my breakneck journey will take me to all kinds of strange locations and will introduce me to an incredibly old but extremely wise man who once worked for the CIA). Or maybe I'm on the run from a deadly assassin who's trying to recover a duffle bag full of drug money I stumbled across in the desert.
And then it dawns on me. This is why we love suspense stories and movies so much: it makes us feel special, different, set-off from everyone else. For us hunted ones, jobs no longer matter, we don't worry about missing our bus (or about our stolen bikes), we don't ever have to stop to use the bathroom, and it's acceptable if we go a day or two without showering. We look around the room at the coffee shop where we sit--to catch a breather and get off the street (and away from those meddling cops), maybe to change our clothes--and know that we have a secret that no one else knows about, except for our goofy friend (who provides comedic relief and keeps us grounded through what otherwise could be an overwhelming experience) and the attractive ex-government worker who somehow feels drawn to our brokenness, our shaky and broken personal history. Everyone else is reading the paper or bickering on their cellphones or worried about their exam in Psychology, but not us. We're on the run.
Being on the run embroiled in some plot that will resolve itself in a tidy two hour and fifteen minute film, has all the charms of life that make it worth living: you can dress up in costume, you forget about saving money for tomorrow because, frankly, if the bad guys have their way, there won't be a tomorrow. You get to eat every meal in a dinner and say very cool things like, "I will take this secret to the grave" and "I don't care what happens, Mary. I promised my mother I would do this for her, and I will." You get to stay in a new motel room every night.
In suspense thrillers, no one has ever stubbed her toe. No one has ever picked up dry-cleaning unless the blazer she was picking up had a clue left in its pocket. No one has ever gotten her period. And sometimes, that's what we want from life: the simplicity of a singular task, however dangerous; the permission to let ourselves throw out social conventions and feel emotions like fear and love and excitement in their most raw forms. Sometimes that's all we want, though we know it's impossible. And eventually, the book has to end. We know that.
I agree, but it is not about throwing out social conventions; it is about building them. Books and movies are like rituals. We commit ourselves to them because they play at catastrophe. But deep down we know they are safe and will restore us to balance. It is this balance, this order, that society needs. We need stories because otherwise we would all be running around like harried lunatics.
ReplyDeleteHmm... you make a good point as always Kevin. Maybe it's the restoration of balance and social conventions that comforts us (or in the case of The Road, the fact that we know that whenever McCarthy's world gets too horrifying, we can always close the book and reside in this world, though that's little comfort as this world's not much better). I think that's what I'm getting at when I talk about how the end will wrap things up and resolve all the tensions (and end with a bounty of treasure). I wonder though, if it isn't equally about the fact that in such stories we can eat every meal in a diner. Who doesn't love a lunch of homemade soup?
ReplyDeleteI think you make a really interesting point here that I've thought about many times but never really been able to put into words. I think as humans we are very attracted to feeling 'special,' and 'needed.' That proud feeling of "I know something you don't" seems to never get old...Besides, if you were in a suspense novel, having to worry about finances/health/long-term well-being? Pfft. I enjoyed it :)
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